I've just been scouring the internet for information on how to deal with someone with anxious depression. I have made it my personal mission whilst being here to try and get my in-laws out of the house at every available opportunity so that they see more than the wall opposite the sofa.
My father in law spends his whole day anxious and guilty and apart from odd occasions when he makes a huge effort and appears almost like his old self (for a fragment of time) he is a nervous shaking wreck.
I know it's an illness, I know it's not his fault, but it is so hard to not get frustrated at his inability to see a single positive in life. He spends his whole day worrying about something or other. My mother in law thinks that I think she is harsh and cruel because she sometimes loses her rag. I'm sure I would too if I had been dealing with this for as long as she has, but I try to see things through fresh eyes.
So what do you do? Try to get him to look on the bright side? Tell him again and again what a wonderful person he is and that this illness is no fault of his own? Bully him into silence from the noises he makes that drive his wife mad?
I wish I knew the answer.
There is a new technology that would turn your father in low's life around in a very short period of time and have a normal life. Since it is new i am not sure you would find it in your area.
ReplyDeletesend me an email and where you live so I send you a place where you could go. rosrod@focusonsolution.com
Ros
Your poor mother in law! Living with that sort of thing day in, day out, is so dreadful.
ReplyDeleteNo sooner do you deal with one worry than he will come up with another one....
I don't have solutions, I suppose it varies with the person and situation, but what about putting it to him that he is hurting his wife by being so negative. Ask him to try to think yp a couple of nice things to say.
Probably won't do much good, but when you've had a full day of nay saying and glumphing one nice remark can make such a difference.To mother in law,, at least, and she has to be kept going in order to cope with him.
Thank you for you interest Ros I will let you know and Helen one of his chief stresses is how he is letting her down. Poor lady
ReplyDeleteYou can't win, can you.
ReplyDelete